Recently, although it has happened to me before, I let my guard down and confided in someone whom I though I could trust (in a business sense). This information (not proprietary or classified) was meant as an aid to improve performance prior to any real actions being taken. I was under the impression that the party in question wanted to understand what others where thinking so they could make preemptive corrections, thereby avoiding any confrontations.
It didn’t turn out that way. Instead the party in question confronted the accusers and followed up with proof by using my name in the process. Blind sided as I was to hear of the incident, I knew I needed to react the right way and learn from this mistake. I owned my error and proceeded to acknowledge the issue with those affected. I can’t expect the same level of trust from the group, nor would I give it if I had been betrayed. Wounds will heel, but going after the person who betrayed my trust would just make two wrongs.
When you are in the middle of a situation like I was, how you respond and own it says a lot about your character. I hope to regain this groups trust over time, but I know that individual responsibility and accountability are the hallmarks of my practice. What we do after we screw up is just as important as learning from the screw up. All of us at times fall prey to this type of betrayal. It’s how we learn to cope with it that sets leaders apart from the rest. We must hold ourselves to the same if not higher standards, as those we manage and consult, otherwise we risk hypocrisy.
Dusting myself off,
Rick Barbosa